As the year draws to a close, the news gets bleaker, folks, at least according to the prophecies of a soothsayer father, long dead. Nostradamus. The French plague physician, astrologer and seer published his famous and cited book "Les Prophรฉties" in 1555. Filled with poetic predictions, the book predicts the coming of wars, natural disasters, assassinations, nuclear attacks and revolutions.
Aptly referred to as the Prophet of Doom by his contemporaries, Nostradamus was far from optimistic in his future outlook. Inspired by biblical texts and his own trauma at the time of the plague, his prose is filled with words like pestilence, hunger, blood, pain and fire, and mostly reads like a bedtime story written by a Norwegian black metal band.
Same as him High at the oracle of fumes in DelphiNostradamus' predictions are intentionally vague and open to myriad interpretations. By 2021 alluded to the start of a zombie apocalypse by writing, "Few young people: half dead to begin with." Gloomy, right? Not if you consider the possibility that He was warning us young people that we are not living, man, but just existing. Plus Matthew McConaughey talk of encouragement that certain near-death, you understand? He also prophesied that 2021 would bring an asteroid that would wipe out the world and that so far (he writes with abject unease) has yet to have an impact.
So with a pocket full of dread, and a thimble full of skepticism, we take a look at what that bearded omen of ruin forecasted for 2022.
Inflation, hunger and cannibalism?
Nostradamus predicted that inflation and famine will overtake us in 2K22, writing: "The price of wheat is so high / That man is moved / His neighbor to eat in despair." An essential human truth is that people are hungry and then turn bad, and with US inflation is the highest in nearly four decadesThe warning of us proves, until now, so true. It is not known whether the increase in the price of wheat inspired this guy or this guy to take a bite out of your neighbor.
AI becomes MVP
While easily confused with Bjรถrk's handwriting, that passage appears to refer to the escalation of artificial intelligence. Cue Elon Musk, Time Magazine Person of the Year and an unequivocal alien in his own right, leading to robot manufacturing and moving their headquarters south to Austin, Texas. More evidence that man is destined to be overcome by immortal machines can be found in the teachings of the aesthetic prophet. Jared Leto.
Nuclear drought
The heavy hits keep coming. Nos predictions are tied to astrological events rather than calendar years, and apocalyptic devotees have been waiting for some time for a nuclear explosion that will trigger severe climate change. Based on this joyous passage, "For forty years the rainbow will not be seen / For 40 years it will be seen every day / The dry land will become drier / And there will be great floods when it is seen", We can postulate that droughts and floods of biblically punishing proportions are coming. Judging from this summer historic drought and the painfully dry conditions in Chile, said punishment may already be upon us.
Add to this the recent revelation that China allegedly armed, dangerous and ready to launch a nuclear strike which could presumably cause a catastrophic water shortage. So far our main defense against drought appears to lie in the hands and nether regions of advocates of moisture awareness Cardi B. and Megan Thee Stallion.
Crypto bro
In addition to forecasting inflation, it gives us a nod to the rise of cryptocurrencies in the coming year. What Annual horoscope translated from the French original: "The inflated gold and silver copies / That after the robbery were thrown into the lake / Upon discovering that everything is exhausted and dissipated by debt / All scripts and bonds will be erased."
While Nostradamus' predictions tend to land closer to the bank than to the money, gold is currently on the rise and a wave of Silicone Valley engineers and executives are leaving their senior positions to join forces with cryptocurrency startups. Coincidence or confirmed prophecy? We wait with bitcoin and holding our breath.
Astrologer Reda Wigle irreverently investigates and reports on planetary configurations and their effect on each zodiac sign. His horoscopes integrate history, poetry, pop culture, and personal experience. She is also an accomplished writer who has profiled a variety of artists and performers, as well as an extensive chronicle of her experiences while traveling. Among the many intriguing topics she's tackled are cemetery etiquette, her love of dive bars, Cuban Airbnbs, a "girl's guide" to strip clubs, and the "weirdest" foods available abroad.
